Sir Roderick Glossop, the eminent nerve specialist, is trying to organize his notes for a scientific paper on Certain Psychotic Episodes Caused by Cocktail Drinking in Modern Young Men. He cited five instances, protecting the identities of the individuals by referring to them as: Tuppy X., Bertie X., Bingo X., Kipper X., and lastly, Pongo X-X. These five had consumed either 2, 3, 4, 6 or 8 cocktails, each of a different kind. In no particular order, the young lunatics consumed either the Green Swizzles, the Martinis, the Gin & Tonics, the Champagne Cocktails, or the May Queens.
With what result? Well, one youth joined the chorus of a musical revue by leaping up on the stage, inserting himself between a couple of long-stemmed chorus girls and doing high kicks. One climbed to the top of the statue of Eros in Picadilly Circus. One fellow up-ended the umbrella of a cafe table and stood in it to sing the Song of the Gondolier. One simply hijacked a hansom cab, leaving the driver standing in the street. The last confused young man made the mental error of throwing a cat at a police officer.
Unfortunately, Sir Roderick was so shaken by recounting all this irrational behaviour that he neglected to take proper scientific notes. He has just enough information to detail his thesis, but it's all muddled up.
Can you help Sir Roderick sort out who did what, under the influence of how many of what beverage, from the 7 clues below?